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7625607Last night I got in the car to drive home, and it started fine, and I put down the window, and pulled onto the street, and went like one block and without me doing ANYTHING, the windshield wipers started going, and all the dash lights went out. The wipers wouldn't shut off, or even go faster or slower.
I pulled over and sat there for a minute, and I shut off the car, but the wipers kept going, and then I tried to take the key out and it wouldn't come out. And I was like this is pretty fucked up. I turned around and went back to my brother's, and he came out and was like wow that's weird. He thought maybe the battery needed to be disconnected and reconnected, but we didn't know where the battery was, and I thought it was in the trunk (it was in the 1997), only we couldn't get the trunk to open. The key fob wouldn't lock or unlock the doors or the trunk, and the meanwhile the windshield wipers were still going.... He had to leave, and I know he was sorry he couldn't stay and figure it out, but I drove to dad's and left my car there and took his old car to drive home. The windshield wipers had slowed, then stopped on the drive there, but the car had started to smell, I think it was overheating. I was glad to make it to dad's driveway and get the car off the road. And honestly kind of glad he wasn't home to point out what terrible decisions I've made the last few years that I have no savings just as my car dies. So I left my car there (the headlights and taillights were on and wouldn't shut off, and I swear there was a noise that I think was the dying motor for the wipers, so the battery will be completely dead by now) and drove dad's old enormous car home.
I called mom and told her, and she started giving me terrible advice ("call the dealership and ask them to tow it in" "Mom, the dealership doesn't have tow trucks. You have to get your car there." "Oh, well call your insurance and have them pay to have it towed. They should pay to get it fixed, too." "Mom, I don't know what kind of insurance you have, but my insurance only covers things like accidents and liability." "Oh, are you sure?" Then she got mad that I wasn't taking notes on her brilliant suggestions, and I was starting to cry because I can't afford to get the car fixed, even if I can find my AAA card and it's still valid.
I'm supposed to have my youngest niece over tonight for a sleepover, so this morning I cleaned up a bit. Yesterday I bought some groceries so I'd have something to feed her, but I still have to clean up the kitchen before I go get her tonight. I want to be able to give her the attention she deserves, but I feel so hopeless I just want to sit and cry. The only job interview I've had all month Wednesday, and I thought it was going well but then at the end the woman was just like, "Ok, well thanks for coming" and it was over and I was like god damn it. Admittedly, during the interview I'd asked if the drivers they employed were union, and she'd said, "No, we'd close before we'd let that happen" which made me want to tell her to go to hell, but I need a job too badly not to take it if she offered.
So, I have just enough to pay my rent for July (or maybe not. I might be $100 short. I'm not actually sure) but that's it. No money for gas or food or to pay my phone bill or electric bill.
Dad won't be back until the end of July. Mom has lots of (terrible, frustrating) ideas but I can't live with her and the asshole, and she doesn't have any money to help me out. Not that I think she should, but I'd take it if she offered.
Feeling pretty hopeless this morning.
I pulled over and sat there for a minute, and I shut off the car, but the wipers kept going, and then I tried to take the key out and it wouldn't come out. And I was like this is pretty fucked up. I turned around and went back to my brother's, and he came out and was like wow that's weird. He thought maybe the battery needed to be disconnected and reconnected, but we didn't know where the battery was, and I thought it was in the trunk (it was in the 1997), only we couldn't get the trunk to open. The key fob wouldn't lock or unlock the doors or the trunk, and the meanwhile the windshield wipers were still going.... He had to leave, and I know he was sorry he couldn't stay and figure it out, but I drove to dad's and left my car there and took his old car to drive home. The windshield wipers had slowed, then stopped on the drive there, but the car had started to smell, I think it was overheating. I was glad to make it to dad's driveway and get the car off the road. And honestly kind of glad he wasn't home to point out what terrible decisions I've made the last few years that I have no savings just as my car dies. So I left my car there (the headlights and taillights were on and wouldn't shut off, and I swear there was a noise that I think was the dying motor for the wipers, so the battery will be completely dead by now) and drove dad's old enormous car home.
I called mom and told her, and she started giving me terrible advice ("call the dealership and ask them to tow it in" "Mom, the dealership doesn't have tow trucks. You have to get your car there." "Oh, well call your insurance and have them pay to have it towed. They should pay to get it fixed, too." "Mom, I don't know what kind of insurance you have, but my insurance only covers things like accidents and liability." "Oh, are you sure?" Then she got mad that I wasn't taking notes on her brilliant suggestions, and I was starting to cry because I can't afford to get the car fixed, even if I can find my AAA card and it's still valid.
I'm supposed to have my youngest niece over tonight for a sleepover, so this morning I cleaned up a bit. Yesterday I bought some groceries so I'd have something to feed her, but I still have to clean up the kitchen before I go get her tonight. I want to be able to give her the attention she deserves, but I feel so hopeless I just want to sit and cry. The only job interview I've had all month Wednesday, and I thought it was going well but then at the end the woman was just like, "Ok, well thanks for coming" and it was over and I was like god damn it. Admittedly, during the interview I'd asked if the drivers they employed were union, and she'd said, "No, we'd close before we'd let that happen" which made me want to tell her to go to hell, but I need a job too badly not to take it if she offered.
So, I have just enough to pay my rent for July (or maybe not. I might be $100 short. I'm not actually sure) but that's it. No money for gas or food or to pay my phone bill or electric bill.
Dad won't be back until the end of July. Mom has lots of (terrible, frustrating) ideas but I can't live with her and the asshole, and she doesn't have any money to help me out. Not that I think she should, but I'd take it if she offered.
Feeling pretty hopeless this morning.
